FUCK my life

It's so much a pain in the ass to get up every morning to go to school, or work, or whatever the hell you do. i have to go back to school in 3/2 weeks but my parents won't scrap enough money together so i can buy new clothes or even new shouse. I have to were the same clothes I've had for two years. how many of you ritch bastards have 20 dollors or a three story house?
so yet again preps and teachers are going to whisper about how im a bitch, poser, emo, poor, fat, ugly, and a cutter. So i want to now whats the piont. why the hell do I get up in the morning if i can so simply run away or kill myself? Well for one im not suicidal and former I have nowhere to go; atleast that wouldn't take more then a day to get to.
But whats really keeping me from using those two logical and easy escape routes is my brother, my dad, and even though I'm reluctent to say; my mom.
You can probly collect from my languge, attitude and veiw of the world that I haven't had the most comforting childhood. It would be an understatment to say that they would die without me or I without one of them.
I'm only 13. I don't want to made fun of, ignored, ridiculed, stared at and hated. I cant belive it, but I'm acutually afraid to go back to school.
Huh.
-Sarah